you know i couldn't last

on march 21, 35 years ago, this woman passed away from leukemia at the age of 29.

only she wasn't technically a woman, she was actually a pre-op transsexual.

candy darling, born james lawrence slattery, appeared in her first warhol film - flesh - in 1968. she also starred in warhol's women in revolt and would later appear in bit parts in major hollywood pictures including klute with jane fonda and la mortadella with sophia loren.

in 1971 she was encouraged by warhol to take hormones in order to grow breasts in time for her appearance in two of german director werner schroeter's films. the pills were taken off the market four years later when they were found to be carcinogenic, but by that point it was too late. candy darling died of leukemia in march of 1974, leaving behind the following note.


to whom it may concern

by the time you read this i will be gone. unfortunately before my death i had no desire left for life. even with all my friends and my career on the upswing i felt too empty to go on in this unreal existence. i am just so bored by everything. you might say bored to death. it may sound ridiculous but it is true.

i have arranged my own funeral arrangements with a guest list and it is paid for. i would like to say goodbye to jackie curtis, i think you're fabulous. holly, sam green a true friend and noble person, ron link i'll never forget you, andy warhol what can i say, paul morrissey, lennie you know i loved you, andy you too, jeremiah don't take it too badly just remember what a bitch i was, geraldine i guess you saw it coming. richard turley & richard golub i know i could've been a star but i decided i didn't want it. manuel, i'm better off now. terry i love you. susan i am sorry, did you know i couldn't last, i always knew it. i wish i could meet you all again.