Tuesday, March 8, 2011

criteria for boys that i like


because i'm really bored, and because i'm hopefully moving in on the aforementioned hipster tonight, this seems like a constructive thing to do

- attractive. and by this i mean, be attractive to me, rather than meet some kind of standardized criteria for attractiveness. i have the most erratic taste in guys ever and i may find people attractive who are by popular opinion, unattractive, and vice versa.
- intelligent. and well-read. if you are a james joyce fan i will inevitably begin worshipping you as some sort of intellectual demi-god.
- interested in me. unfortunately guys who meet this criteria are few and far between.
- good taste in music. i won't, nay, cannot love someone who listens to nickelback. sad but true. music takes up such a huge proportion of my life, i have an enormous emotional connection to it and i like to talk about it a lot, so if i want to discuss the finer points of the velvet underground's loaded and you are only interested in 3oh!3, it's probably not going to work out.
- open-minded. about smoking, drinking, drugs etc. i have no interest in boring sanctimonious people.
- tolerant of my social awkwardness. your friends will probably think i'm a bitch. most people do. just so you're prepared, i will be too intimidated to converse with them normally, and this may or may not improve over time.

i am deeply emotionally dependent on my relationships with others, so if you meet this criteria i will be whipped almost immediately and be utterly bereft and broken hearted when you inevitably get bored and leave. so uhh, get in line boys.

2 comments:

bobb said...

I hope you find what you are looking for Alex:).

Speaking of "Loaded", it took me few listenings to love it. I heard it when it was new, and the although "The Velvet Underground" was a step towards a different sound, it was still quite surprising.

Anonymous said...

if only all girls could be as perfectly clear about their minimum requirements as a computer programme...

...at your service, l.

ps: it would be dishonest to say that i hope your kind-of-date with the aforementioned hipster did go excessively well.